*deep breath*
Bruh, Life really sucks sometimes. Yeah, sounds cliche(sp) but I don't care. Shit just sucks at times. Damn. I really want 2 feel different about everything. I know I'm blessed to wake up each morning, and please believe I thank God any and every chance I get. Really though, I thank him before I sleep, when I wake, during my shower, when Im walking to class lol, all that. But stuff just still feels so much more awkward then they should be. I see to many voids that shouldn't exist. Sucks man. Damn. Family acting...well, I guess the term would be "brand new". This is why I used to wish I wasn't the oldest when I was younger, or the only boy for that matter. Damn. Can't believe the same shit that pissed me off when I was 4, pisses me off now at 22. Seriously. I don't really want to hear, "thats life, get over it" cause I already understand that. Guess I just want to finally complain about it lol, I try not to so hard though. Life is what you make it. You shouldn't have to please anyone else but yourself, but thats bullshit when all you ever had your whole life was your sister and your mother. Those are the people I had/still have. Every move I make in some way or another has something to do with them and there approval, yet I still try to distance myself so that know one can say they did anything for me. Make sense? I dunno, def not going back and editing lol

FML!!!

ugghhh man im out,
hope shit clears itself out cause' I'm a couple steps from saying fuck it.

..not really
peace.

Figured it out

Greetings and salutations lol,
hope all is well with everyone. K let's get to it lol,
I brainstormed something at work today with refrencebto this blog. I figure I don't want to give up blogging because it's just to good of a venting tool for me lol. I love the main point of sites like Twitter, that being say whatever yo want randomly 140 characters at a time. Still though I like using this for the same thing, just in a more organized manner. Hopefully it will make sense down the line lol.

What I plan on doing is using this for a week in review type thing, meaning I'll most lowly only post here once a week. I'm holding every Sunday evening. So yeah we'll try this out for a while...
...
lol
k...

Week of 9/14-9/21
Monday- began pretty comfortably. I had been sick the previous week and was truly just getting over the symptoms. Beig sick SUCKS. I had not struggled that much at a job in a while. I can't ever remember being so sick that I was about to pass out. Not since I was younger atleast. Anyhot that's an experience I would not like exeriencing the rest of this fall(wishful thinking maybe?) oh well lol...but yeah I got through Monday pretty str8..

Tuesday- was hectice, as it usualy is being that it is my busiest(sp) class/work day. Woke up around 1030 hateing that I continue to sleep in during the week but am able to hop my ass up fast as hell for work on Saturday and Sunday lol. So yeah I made it to class stupid late. If anybody reading this was ever in or still in college then you know parking is a biotch lol.. So yeah it was one Get car inspected 
Clean car out
where I said eff t I'm late I'll take my time lol...I made it to class and was pretty str8 with what I caught on to. Math has always been a weak subject for me but wiu my added motivation from passing in summer school lol I figure I'll be fine. So yeah left class and definately went home and got lazy lol shouldve went to work but made that opposite move. I think I blamed it on still feeling "sick" so yeah missed that lol
hit biology at the six o'clock hour. Texted my way through lecture lol, then hit up lab and did my thing. I haven't taken Bio since 10th grade so you say I'm rusty lol but I'll figure that ish out too. Got home late after a Wally world run and then chilled for he rest of he night.

Wednesday- no class!!! Lol love my class scheule this semester...anyways I chilled for the most part until going to work then went and hit the mall wig friends. Also went and saw Tyler Perrys new joint,"I can do bad all by myself" It was a damn good movie. I didn't get as emotional as a lot of others did but I felt it lol...that was a fun day..

Thursday- more or less was the same as Tuesday except I didn't have a lab to go to.

Friday- chilled all day until gointo pick up a couple my pols. Ran aomeerrands and chilled mostly. Bought my touch:) which is what I'm using now lol to blog that is...

Saturday/Sunday- work work WORK...that's all I feel like I did lol that and ate, slept. Thank God I only see that building twice a week. I've been hearing that some "bad behind back" talking has been going on. Let's hope not lol

guess that's it people lol...mind you it's now 5 something in The morning, just doing this mock blog lol
I'm def. Aiming toward keeping this up. It helps internally lol
but yeah peace y'all.

www.Twitter.com/_DelE

New ish!

Oh sh*t yah boys back lol
guess I'll ask again who the hell am I talking to? Lol oh well maybe I'll get some Twitter readers lol yeah I said it. The whole reason I been absent is because of Twitter lol my bad blogger I just lost my mojo but hopefully it's back and stuff. Anyways I'm doing well just trying to figure out life iguess lol cornyyyy Lol anyways I got a new toy:)
I have been a pro blackberry ani iPhone person for a while lol but like I never haD a big problem with iPods. iPod touchs to be exact. Look, long story short,this thing is the SHIT. If you haven't guessed I'm blogging from it now lol

Here is my advice to anybody contemplating a phone decision. If you like the all in one combo, phone with music Internet blah blah blah then the iPhones cool BUT I think it's just to expensive. I have a BB that u only spend about 80 on a month. With the touch I get eery feature minus the camera that the iPhone has. And everything I download is free lol so yeah...

Anyways this is my I'm back blog lol...I have some BB memo pad blogs to post later and mad other ish to talk about, later lol

But yeah stay blessed.
Peace.
www.twitter.com/_DelE

RIP McNair

One of the Greatest Professional/Collegiate football players to ever lace up.

Buzzed like hell, almost ready to pass out. Just randomly felt like blogging. Watched this crazy ass movie earlier with the smart dude from ATL, umm his name was????? esquire that's it lol I literally stopped typing for 2 minutes to ponder that. Anyways, it was pretty good. Drank my drank lol layed back and parlayed.I'm starting to want a "chill" chick to hang around...been hangin with my boys to much*pause*
Anyway, I did a lot today, well yesterday rather. Life feels great when you actually utilize the time you're blessed with. That make sense?maybe not, who cares though cause I still don't think anybody reads this lol.
Randomly I just realized how much I hate that my car is f*ckin up left and right lol, oh well though ill make due. Shit I'm bored as hell now and beginning to realize how random this blog is going to be when I read back over it lol,


Damn I should go to sleep.


"She's my little quarter back, yah digg? Cause' I'm all that in the sack, yah digg?" -Jigga

K its time for some sleep lol
*random*
g'night all
peace
TWITTER.COM/_AKOOP

So as of late, twitter has taken over as my outlet for random, first thought commentary? Lol of what I'm doing or for where I'm at(not really) but don't worry blogger, I haven't forgot about thou...(Mad I'm speaking to the site) anyways, things have been going really well for me. Honestly just the same as its been but I think that's good. I've been in summer school the past several weeks and I'm doing pretty well. I've also been going hard, working as usual. And I've also been chilling whenever possible, catching up with my friends from time to time. I'm really glad I've been able to find the time to do that seeing as how I've noticed more and more lately that we all are going towards our own individual paths. Its all great to me. But yeah, I'd grade my summer and overall happiness with things right now as a A-/B+. It would probably be an A+ but I figure there's always room for improvement. Umm what else? I think that I'm missing having that "ride or die" chick by my side this summer as I find myself wanting that extra support or hug,kiss,touch, etc. So yeah that's missing. But yeah things are great overall. I'm dreading going to work in a few hours but I know I must. I'm gonna have to work on not beating myself up(not literally) over the things that must happen, like, school and going to work. Its more going to work these days lol but yeah ima try to finally put this blackberry down. Before I do, I want to say RIP to Michael Jackson, Farah Faucet(sp) and Ed McMahon. Its been tough for a lot of folks. But yeah, be easy all. Till next time.
Peace
www.twitter.com/akoop
u know I had to do it lol

Happy Memorial Day everyone...enjoy you're families, eat lots, and remember the people for whom we recognize this day for. Be back later ppl...
Peace

brb

I should really really reallyyyyy stop leaving this thing for so long lol...I will def. Be back...check for another "bored at work" post and recap on what's been going on.
Even though nobody reads this(most likely)
But yeah ill be back.
Peace.

Twitter

is cool? I guess lol
follow me if you want. lol
peace.

from the little corner in the back of the room

That "room" being the big ass library lol
Yes, I am in the library and actually getting some work done. I felt like I should use my "free" resources lol even if I have waited till damn near the end of the semester to do so. I've just never truly ever been a "library" guy. Like I usually just get in my room at home and go to work. But yeah this is pretty cool. And seeing as how I've procrastinated a lot lately, this is a good way for me to catch up without getting distracted at home, although i'm here on BLOGGER right now lol. Anyways let me get back to this stuff here, be back later.
peace

Class is a draggggg today. lol
peace.

Part 2:
why do I continue to play myself?guess cause it seems so easy to quit,id never be able to forgett it.i hope smthng comes from this stailmate.damn

I have so much to say but I open my mouth just to hear a bunch of dumb ish come out.Its makes so much sense when I'm alone yet when I tell you, I freeze.F*ck!

word

So that mobile blogging def. works great! so now I can just type randomly from my phone when I don't feel like logging on lol
So anyway what's up blogger??
Nothing here with me.
I should really be studying but I just keep finding other stuff to occupy my attention. Don't worry though, eventually I'll get to it...for real lol I'm not just saying that.
Anyways, I've just been thinking a lot today. Randomly catching myself off topic, or well like dazing off into something else completely opposite of what I was doing. Did it in the store, in the car on the road(which is probably not a good look)and even in the bathroom lol I was shaving(also probably not a good look). Random ish just keeps popping into my mind. Nothing to serious, just stuff about money, my situation in a few months, you know like where I see myself, and even stuff like I wonder what such and such is doing blah blah blah. All just random lol.
After I realized that I've been doing this all day I started to wonder was it on purpose or was I just looking to deep into this whole situation lol, and you know I probably am. But hey, it's something to type about lol because I find it harder and harder to figure out stuff to put here, when like I try to...like If i log on to post for no reason or haven't had anything going on, well its like pointless lol. I get here then I babble(like I am now) and then I leave. The mobile ish though will help because I can finally have a way to type str8 here as sooooooooooooon as something happens lol or runs across my mind, or whatever. Thats why I like this thing though, it's completely random. What a great thing for such a random person(me)
Anyways I'm going to find something to do or try to get lost in thought again lol, I'll get at this at some point soon.
till next time,
Peace

This is a test post to see if the mobile blogging thing is working.
peace

It's harder and harder to figure out title's for these things lol..geeshhh
Anyways, Whats up blogger?
Everything good here, Just chillin on the couch.
I'm trying to figure out what to talk about..hmmm..
Oh I know I was on some phone review site earlier...Im debating on either going blackberry or iPhone
I mean yeah I know what both phones are good and bad for...I just wonder which one I'll be happiest with. Probably either or honestly, but I dunnoe at the same time.
Oh well though, it's cool to think about but it will be a long while before I make a decision on that. I have other ish to pay for lol
So yeah If you look up top, you'll notice my new glasses...wait, here look down..


Don't mind the pose lol I was trying to look good andddd hit the button lol multi-tasking..

Its hard to get used to something constantly being on your face, but I'll deal because my vision has gotten 10x's better.

So yeah anywaysss Im bored as hell..guess i'll watch some more ESPN.

peace.

ongoing struggle

This question/problem/scenario has been coming up a lot lately. I have asked myself this, and I even have friends doing the same...

Can I or anybody else be held responsible for things I don't know about? Like, am I expected to be a mind reader? Expected to understand things for which I never knew existed between us?

No.

I've said time and time again to folks(couples), that people who don't communicate,won't know two things: Who THEY are and what THEIR relationship is.

It's shared, whether its accepted or not...the relationship I mean.
This goes for anything, friendships, bf/gf relationships, marriages, etc.
You cannot expect anyone to know whats going on with you if you don't get at the other person with your problems, insecurities. It's understood how hard that can be at times, but when that other person is trying to work with you on it, you don't just let the guy/girl look stupid. Acknowledge that they are trying and do your DAMN best to try and help the situation, don't hurt it.

Now, mind you I am not a professional on this stuff, its just how I feel and what I've figured out in my experiences dealing with similar situations.

I have been going through a "situation" where I feel like things don't seem like they will change for the better. But I have to keep reminding myself...
"When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all up hill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow--
You may succeed with another blow,
Success is failure turned inside out--
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit."

Damn that was long lol but true.

Forreal i was going to post about how bad I feel and how mad I am that I feel like things will never turn out how I want...but I've realized, The harder I go, the better I get...and even if things don't turn out how I may want them to, something great will come about sooner or later. And I wan't to stick around to see that later, no matter how long it takes.

peace.

[at work]3.28.09

yeah
at work again.
bored...nah lol
I don't even think that's much funny anymore lol because I'm never bored "working" while online, and doing random things.
Anyways I'm just trying to pass the few minutes I have left on my lunch break.
Today's been a good day. I woke up extra early, but didn't feel sleepy at all.
I wen't to be rather late, but that was due to the fact that I had slept earlier in the evening so I was kinda rested.
I took an extended shower lol. Then got dressed, even ate breakfast and still had enough time to cruise to work. I usually drive fast as hell just to be 5 minutes early, but today It wasn't any traffic. I even listened to some music...see usually I can't stand talking in the mourning or any type of loud noise lol...and I know your probally saying to yourself, "well why not just listen to soft music, or turn the ish down?" lol well see I don't like hearing anything at all but my car running if I have to lol. Don't know why. It's just I notice more and more how cranky I can really be in the mourning. I would'nt say that I'm not a mourning person but i def. don't like to exert much energy when I do get up. Today was diffrent though lol
I've been doing little online assignments for class, and work. I've even started planning out April, as far as what I already know I have to do and what not.
Im super excited about my new bank account. Not as if I'm rich or about to be cake'n off it, it's just neat when you get that fresh debit card lol. I've been using my one account now since I was in highschool, and allthough I had to re-new the card last September, it was still the same ish, same code, all that lol...so getting with this new bank(notice I havnt said the name lol I dont want to)...it feels good. Like a new toy you can't play with to much or you'll break it...or in this case go broke! lol
I feel super balanced right now. Mellow as hell.
Scratch that, mellow as heaven lol. hell don't seem to mellow...
I heard TI got a year and one day in court yesturday.
I hope he pull through, which I know he will. He's intelligent beyond his years, and like the reporters keep saying...you just believe that guy when he speaks...whether he's rapping, or apologizing and owening up to his mistakes. His show on MTV, Road to Redemption, hit hard in a lot of peoples minds and it was def. a good look in my opinion. I hope that when he does get up 366 days from whenever he starts his stent that he goes super hard. Only thing Id be mad at if i was him is, why the hell they give me a day after a year lol...like come on Judge, really?lol...a year and a damn day...Id be in jail like damn I just did 365 straight days, and these ni99as want me to do one more #%(**W#U day? lol check my abbreviated "curse words" ugly lol
But yeah he'll pull through, and I can't wait till he get out. It's always exciting to see what an artist has thought of while incarcerated.

Anyways I think that's about it for now, I'ma get at this later.
Putting pictures up of the glasses I buy lol yeah Im that bored and or boring...oh well lol
peace.

2night

No real point to it or reason lol but I still wanted to...Guess I'll randomly say first thing I think of...

*yawning*yawning*

Yah boy hit the bank today, and did pretty good. Didn't spend on anything today sept for what I had to. I still have big plans for latter down the line, so I def. want to keep up the good work with that.

Damn soon as I want to write I can't think of anything lol

Check that post I put right before this though, def. a sad situation.

Anyways I'm jumping out the windows with this one...lol lame???

who cares, I'm out till I think of something for later..lol

peace.

DALLAS OFFICER DELAYED NFL PLAYER AS RELATIVE DIED

This is just a post straight from yahoo, and also saw on SportsCenter earlier tonight. Sad situation. My prayers go out to Mr. Moats and his family.

By SCHUYLER DIXON, Associated Press Writer

DALLAS (AP)—A police officer was placed on administrative leave Thursday over a traffic stop involving an NFL player whom he kept in a hospital parking lot and threatened to arrest while his mother-in-law died inside the building.

Officer Robert Powell also drew his gun during the March 18 incident involvingHouston Texans running back Ryan Moats in the Dallas suburb of Plano, police said.

“I can screw you over,” he said at one point in the videotaped incident. When another officer came with word that Moats’ mother-in-law was indeed dying, Powell’s response was: “All right. I’m almost done.”

Dallas Police Chief David Kunkle apologized to the family and announced that Powell would be on paid leave pending an internal investigation.

“When we at the command staff reviewed the tape, we were embarrassed, disappointed,” Kunkle said. “It’s hard to find the right word and still be professional in my role as the police chief. But the behavior was not appropriate.”

Powell, 25, a three-year member of the force, stopped Moats’ SUV outside Baylor Regional Medical Center at Plano after Moats rolled through a red light.

Police officials said Powell told his commanders he believed he was doing his job, and that he drew his gun but did not point it. Kunkle said Powell was not necessarily acting improperly when he pulled his weapon out, but that once he realized what was happening should have put the gun back, apologized and offered to help the family in any way.

“His behavior, in my opinion, did not exhibit the common sense, the discretion, the compassion that we expect our officers to exhibit,” Kunkle said.

Moats’ wife, who was in the car along with other relatives, said Powell pointed his weapon at her.

“He was pointing a gun at me as soon as I got out of the car,” Tamishia Moats told The Dallas Morning News.

The Moats family did not immediately return messages left by The Associated Press. Powell did not respond to requests for comment through the Dallas police union.

Video from a dashboard camera inside the officer’s vehicle, obtained by Dallas-Fort Worth station WFAA-TV, revealed an intense exchange in which the officer threatened to jail Moats.

He ordered Tamishia Moats, 27, to get back in the SUV, but after pausing for a few seconds, she and another woman rushed into the hospital. She was by the side of her mother, 45-year-old Jonetta Collinsworth, when she died a short time later from breast cancer.

“Get in there,” said Powell, yelling at Tamishia Moats as she exited the vehicle. “Let me see your hands!”

“Excuse me, my mom is dying,” Tamishia Moats said. “Do you understand?”

Ryan Moats explained that he waited until there was no traffic before proceeding through the red light. When Powell asked for proof of insurance, Moats grew more agitated and told the officer to go find it.

“My mother-in-law is dying! Right now! You’re wasting my time!” Moats yelled. “I don’t understand why you can’t understand that.”

As they argued, the officer got irritated.

“Shut your mouth,” the officer said. “You can either settle down and cooperate or I can just take you to jail for running a red light.”

By the time the 26-year-old NFL player received a ticket and a lecture from Powell, about 13 minutes had passed. When he and Collinsworth’s father entered the hospital, they learned Collinsworth was dead.

Kunkle said the video showed that Moats and his wife “exercised extraordinary patience, restraint in dealing with the behavior of our officer.”

“At no time did Mr. Moats identify himself as an NFL football player or expect any kind of special consideration,” Kunkle said. “He handled himself very, very well.”

The Moats family, who are black, said they can’t help but think that race might have played a part in the white officer’s behavior.

“I think he should lose his job,” Ryan Moats said.

When the exchange was at its most contentious, Powell said he could tow Moats’ SUV if he didn’t have insurance and that he could arrest him for fleeing because he didn’t immediately stop when Powell turned on his sirens. The pursuit lasted a little more than a minute.

“I can screw you over,” Powell said. “I’d rather not do that. Your attitude will dictate everything that happens.”

The ticket issued to Moats was dismissed, Dallas police spokesman Lt. Andy Harvey said.

Texans spokesman Kevin Cooper said the team had no comment.

Moats, a third-round draft choice of the Philadelphia Eagles in 2005 out of Louisiana Tech, was cut by the Eagles in August and later signed with the Texans. In three seasons as a backup, he’s rushed for 441 yards and scored four touchdowns.

He was a standout at Bishop Lynch High School, a private school in Dallas, rushing for more than 2,600 yards and 33 touchdowns as a senior.

Reflecting back.."the week that was" lol

Guess where I'm at?!?
...
figured it out yet?lol work!!!
Yeah. It seems like the only time I can put focus on writing these things is during my random "off" time during my shift at work. It's cool though. I guess you could look at it as me reflecting on my week. So that's what I think I will do, reflect.

Monday:
Let's see...
Well, Monday started off with me taking a late mid-term for Spanish. Since we had spring break the previous week, and a few random snow storms, we ended up having to wait to take the mid-term till after break was done. It was "okay". I didn't knock it out the park but it was still all good. I had plans on meeting up with my boy later in the week, so that was something to look forward to. See, he moved about a year ago and he has had plans on moving back up here, so our plans collectively are to move in to a place and share rent and what not. You'll here about this more in a minute...

Tuesday:
Tuesday brought about a day off for me, but more work to complete. I ended up withdrawing from my History class I was in, just because there was no real reason for me to be in it other than to just have a "fuller" schedule of classes. I'm already caught up on those classes and it wasn't part of my major load. So yeah that happened.

Wednesday:
Wednesday my boy came through and we chilled and what not. At first he was not about to stay long because of a "emergency" call from his girl. Well, to her it was emergency. Long story short he ended up staying and we chilled, had a pretty straight time. While he was here, he was amped up and ready to move. But soon after he got back home he flipped the script and it seemed as if he didn't want to come, well that and the fact that he basically said, "nah, I don't want to come till about another year"..lol I was like damn man, while you was here it was cool, but oh well. I will admit I was mad, but I can't be completely un-understanding about it because we talked about 6 months from now moving, well August/September. And I mean that's half a year, so another 6 months wouldn't completely be to off. I may be making my own move though, solo, but I'll keep you posted on that.

Thursday:
Brought about some more chill/off time for me. I did work for Friday's English class and just relaxed. Had another talk with my boy, and some things got aired out. I mean I basically told my peace and he said his. So we aren't completely throwing out the idea that we could be moving in 6 months, but if it doesn't happen like that, the end of the world won't come lol. We will just have to make plans for something else, even if I end up making my own plans.

Friday:
English class was boring, but productive lol. I turned in my work and just relaxed like I usually do in that class. It's held inside this media, computer room where the news paper people type up and print all there articles. Since the class is only on Friday's, it really doesn't matter where we have class in that building, so we do it in there. I chilled with my bungalow head(mentioned in a post back I think) and we just caught up. Well we ran some errands, chilled, argues(just a little) but then brought it back. It was serious but nothing to out of the ordinary. Just expressing opinions and coming to a mutual agreement on most of what we spoke about. No, this isn't my girl, nor is she potentially going to be. That boat hasn't sailed past and won't for a while. Just clarifying that lol.

Saturday:
Well, im here typing to whoever is reading this besides the voice inside my head lol *pause* don't want people thinking I'm a nut. You know how you read stuff over after or during the time you type it and you here yourself? lol okay let me stop before I sound anymore crazier.

I hope SUNDAY is a productive day, although I try to do as least as possible. I will be at work, again however so maybe you'll get another one of these posts lol.

But yeah back to work I go. I'm glad this thing took me away from what I was doing here, atleast for a few minutes anyway.

Hope to hit this up later,
peace.

Random

Yes,
yet again, I write to thee, from work lol.
Bored? Sort of.
Well, I am lol but oh well..
Anyways, My little bungalow head just called me lol she's cool.
Anyhow ya boy is just chilling' at work..
nothing to really talk about.
I miss Tasha..so if she reads this she should TEXT/CALL/TEXT me lol
Oh, and surprisingly I miss school lol...spring break is cool but it's mad long.
Damn there's nothing to really talk about lol
...
Oh so yeah, I'm going to try and spell check these blogs more lol. Besides the random (lol) statements, I should try and be a little more critical with that. Or maybe I'm just so super bored that I'm making myself do it. lol Who cares

Well this is going in circles, or is about to so I'm going to hit it back later.

TASHA HIT ME UP EVEN THOUGH YOUR PROBABLY READING THIS LIKE N*GGA YOU HIT ME UP lol..

Peace.

at trabajar(work in espanol...I think lol)

So yeah I'm at work..bored as hell, listening to Rook(I couldnt get her blog link to work, but its something like Gorgoeus-geek.com) blab about her tonsils lol...nah she's not boring me but the job is...I just been sitting around. But wait, this is probally the best hustle/job/whatever you want to call it, that I've ever been apart of..so I'm content with making money all while being bored lol...

So hey, it might not be a big deal...this is my 50th post lol..cool
Not making a big deal of it, it just looks cool.

but yeah Im honestly just doing this blog out of sheer boredom.

Heres the science of it all...at my job I do a few diffrent activities...I monitor/answer/and make phone calls...I also patrol the building randomly just to make sure things are working in proper order, as its the weekend and nobody's really here to do it...so yeah...like frontdesk security?without the security lol...During the week its a lot more difficult because there is constant flow, but on the weekends it's mad chill..

I just turn on some jazz music..yeah jazz lol, and just melow out.
I almost always want to fall asleep, so I have to make up something Caffieneish lol..hotchocalate/cappacino/sugar/3 creamers/2 sugars/ its probally bad as hell for me but I damn sure am not falling asleep anymore lol...its only like the second time i've made it though. I'm usually wide awake when i get here but not today..

Anyways just an update, spring break is coming to a close and I didn't do to much.
In the beg. of the week I attended my grandparents 52nd Wedding anny...it was cool to see so many people I didn't know lol, mad cousins/aunts/uncles and all that.

But after that, I really didn't do much. Hung out here and there, mostly chilled/slept and ate lol

Now its time to go back to class, but I can't say its all bad...I'm getting closer and closer to moving the fuck out...tired of taking care of everybody else, time for M.E to do M.E.<
But yeah I think im done for now with this post, i'll hit this back later.
peace.


oh yeahhhhhh lol
This week im opening a second bank account with Wacovia. I heard they got bought out or something, or the name change is coming...but who cares lol I don't want bank of America and besides SECU(State Employee's Credit Union), Wacovia has the most reliable ATM resource...like I can get to them both a lot faster then I would any other bank's ATM...so yeah lol hitting that up soon, and this blog LATER lol
peace.

so...

It snowed again.

Weird how a couple of the neighboring schools had Spring Break begin this week lol

You don't really want to have to equate snow with the words Spring Break, but it does happen.  I was telling this girl earlier in the year that the weather here sucks when it wants to and is great when it wants to be.  Could have the best summer day/night, or the worst...Could be expecting sunshine, and walk right into a thunder storm lol...and like today..could be thinking I'm going to start my break off right by leaving to do something, then it snows.

The rest of us start break this Friday through the rest of next week.  I dought it will snow or anything by Friday but it won't matter for me cause'  I still don't have any type of plan on what I'm gonna try to do.  But we'll see...anyways I'm gonna put pic.s up just like last time...next post

peace.

Dont get to comfortable

So...

I havent been around as much as I would like to...I've been saying in earlier posts that its been because of work, maybe an illness, and school..all of that..

Well yeah its the truth lol but still I've figured more and more that anybody here reading is cool peoples, and if you don't read it..Im not mad lol this is for my own benifit so what I do, or don't do is up to me...lol

That wasn't directed at anyone I just felt like clarifying.

Anyways to get to what I was wanting to blog about...

If your friends with me on facebook, then you know that my status as of 10:30ish said something to the effect of...

[my.name.lol.]..."is sad he had to get somewhat of a reality check tonight...however small, it still hit me harder then a bundle of bricks!..we as a PEOPLE have a long way to go."

So Yeah...Earlier tonight I recieved a big reality check.  I guess you'll want to know the story behind it...mind you it isn't as big as it might seem when you read it, but understanding my own positions and past experiences, it hit harder then expected...

LET ME REMIND YOU BEFORE YOU KEEP READING THAT THIS MAY NOT SEEM BIG TO YOU BUT IT EFFECTED ME..lol

Me, my girl Drea and my girl Danny(her names daniel but i always spell it wrong from how she does lol)...well anyways we all went to get some food...I had just left a music rehersal and they where doing laundry, so I figured they would want to take a break go get some food since I know I hadnt ate and they know they wasn't feeling that wack ass cafe food lol...so yeah we went to this little strip full of places who where still open.  At first we decided to hit subway...I mean yeah some of yall dont like them lol I dont especially but I love there 5 dollar footlong menu lol butttt we quickly decided not to do subway last second after we walked in just because of my girl Drea was like nahh I want a salad lol so whatever we go next door to this pizza italian type place.   She ordered an Greek Salad or whatever and that was that.  After seing those prices lol me and Danny quickly decided to dip right back to Subway lol...so yeah we all got our food and was about to sit and eat...Then Drea realized that she didnt have any type of eating utinsels...so me being the nice guy that I am, I went and got it for her from the place next door...I walk in, and there was about the same number of customers that was there when we first walked in...ummm ZERO lol...they owner was sweeping, and the cashier lady was wyping down the tables...anyways I ask..." hey can I get some silver wear, my friend didn't get any for her food"...he goes.."sir you have to(stuttering) by something to get silverwear"...I guess cause he was mad me and danny left, he figured he'd make his point by letting me know that I couldnt get any of his DOLLAR GENERAL silver wear that was complimentary unless I bought something...so I say to him, "its not for me its for my friend who bought something earlier.." he looks back at the white woman, and says "well, what did she buy?" very sternly, might I add, as if i was lieing...Okay again I say I was only asking for afork really lol...anyways this dude listens to me say the girl bought a salad, matter of fact a Greek Salad...before I could finish my sentence, he was rushing to get my friends silver wear...i mean dropping other stuff lol just to get as if he realized..CRAP I MIGHT HAVE EFFED UP THINKING THIS DUDE WAS TRYING TO PLAY ME....

anyways not to keep typing lol it only made me feel bad inside because i felt as if he had profiled me as some dude trying to come in and use his silver wear for other peoples products...well if this was a resturaunt, or even if the stuff had his name on it, i wouldnt have asked...im not stupid, I know if you want a cup, or some ice, or anything in between dealing with food then yeah, you have to buy something...but other then that come own, a fork? a knife? a diffrent colored plastic one at that?...damn man lol

Like I said if you've read this far, you would see that it wasnt as big as it might sound after u read it, or whatever, but I mean to me it just made me realize how far people have to go mentally...It sucked bad to feel like that...yeah I wear jordans, i had on some nice fit jeans yah know, not Lil Wayne fit lol but they werent like super bigg...yah know a black tee, regular fit...and a damn hoody lol I mean hood? not really...was I walking with a limp? NO lol, was a black guy coming in alone asking for something free, yeah lol but thats not bad to me...oh well maybe Im makign a big deal out of it but it sucked to me inside...I left out a lot of details because this thing is long as heck...I mean dude looked me up and down, saw i was being sincere...I just didnt think asking for plastic forks and knives was a bad thing lol...he saw me leave because I felt like it lol nothing against him, just 8 dollars for some pizza or a salad isnt that appealing to me...yet when I come ask for a fork, he flips the script on me?, maybe people will say he didnt and that Im overreacing blah blah blah but you would have really had to be there to get my drift...lol sounds so cliche? but who cares lol It happens right..

God bless that dude, but he def. isnt getting my service no more...I feel like If I can't get silver wear, for somebody else who did buy something at that, then eff it lol...his food isn't even that good...I havent went there to eat since like 2005?maybe?lol who cares

Anyways this shit long lol damn...I feel better now but i felt like typing it...no matter how bad, a little bad or a lot bad?lol u know what I mean...issues like this matter to me

How dare we talk about big stuff without understanding smaller situations...

Sorry for allt he mis-spellings, you should know by now that I don't like hitting spell check lol and I don't really use full complete sentences at times...I like typing how I would want to talk this stuff out sometimes, and that's not always in complete sentences..lol well it is but it isn't...u got me?lol probally not...but fuck it I'm probally theonly one reading this..lol

But yeah schools good, works good, everything str8 lol

Ima hit this up later

"stay sucker free, an stop suckin on me.."

-jojo simons

AMEN lol j/k

peace.

Feb. 14th

Was straight..

I mean I didn't go out or anything to to "special" although I had a meaningful night.

Me and my homegirl chilled, like we always do...watched a couple movies

Madagascar 2 & The family that prey's...

Yo both were really good, specially the Tyler Perry joint.

I already knew Madagascar 2 was gonna be funny, cause the first one was classic...was just worried they might have watered down the comedy...meaning like in the first one they had some shakey stuff going on lol a few of the jokes had me saying, damn is this for kids?lol but I mean it was still good.

Family that Preys acctually had me paying attention the whole time...me and D was like damn, what the hell lol trying to figure ish out before it happnd...but yeah not to get into all my fav. parts lol it was nice.

..update..

But yeah things are going good for me..nothings really changed to much.  Still workign hard as ever, just have realized that keeping this focus/drive is tough when you gotta do it alone...guess thats why I depend on the little stuff that I keep hold of personally.  I'm tryin to keep it all together though, and I will...just have to keep praying, and motivated through everything thats going on.

Anyways though i guess Ill hit this up later, I'm a little beat from work earlier, andddddd its half time of the NBA allstar game...so yeah

Ya'll see Allen Iverson cut his hair off?lol damn Allen, I guess Carmelo got to you. lol nahh it was bout time I think..takes it back to the G-town days.

But yeah good game so far, time for second half momentarily...hit this up later though

peace.

Checkin in, just wanted to write while I had some time to post.

Tuesdays are great for me cause' I spend the end of the previous week doing so much that after I get done on Monday with work/class/etc..I like not having to really do anything till about 2 o'clock.

Anyways

Aint nothin been goin on,

Recently been re-evaluating myself inside, like emotionaly and all that.

I mentioned early when I first started this blog that some things had been going on witha girl, who I was with a short time but then we ended up becoming "just" friends lol.

I know everybody's experienced that.

Anyways, me and her are probally tighter then we ever we're when we called ourselves being together.

 However I still wonder at times if she thinks about being with me, like I do randomly when it pops into my head.

Don't get me wrong, I'm good being single right now...and I know even if I wasn't I'd still have to be content just because of the things that are going on around me, however

To be real, I miss her yo forreal and saying I don't or beating around the bush about it would be a lie.

I love that girl, and she loves me...we say it everytime we speak but it's more then words, we have a bond yah know...bestfriend type ish

and I love that

I just wonder, how would it be if we ever got back together yah know.

I talked to her about it the other day after we celebrated her B.day along with her friends...and we also have spoken about it the last couple of nights after we got done chillin, or hittn the gym.

We both basically came up with the same synopsis...that was that basically we probally could revisit an "us" later down the line but not right now...and even if we never did, the only thing I know I asked of her was that we just keep each other posted on feelings, emotions, thoughts..I know it can't be perfect, but I mean truthfully if she wants to make moves, other then with me, id atleast like to know, feel me.

She asked the same of me, and then she finally admited that seing me talk or even be friendly with other girls does set off certain alarms inside her lol...thats something I never knew affected her, even when we was together, so that kind of felt good.

Who knows though?, maybe we'll re-kindel(however you spell that, i refuse to spell check right now lol..lazy)

But yeah enough of that, what else...ummmm

I'm doing real well with my money managment/time managment/and gym commitment...hit that mugg up 5 times aweek monday-friday and take the weekends off, only because I work so early and then somewhat late into the evening so yeah I feel good about that.

Schools good, getting suprisingly good grades on Test's...No, im not stupid lol but to be real I'm not the biggest book worm I know lol so yeah.

I guess I should say bye now since I have to make moves soon, i'll hit this up later though

peace.

Super Bowl XLIII

So I havent been around to update at all lately due to a recent lost and re-gaining of laptops lol

Quick update then I'll get to the post...

Finally got my phone situation str8, for those of ya'll who know me...I hate not having a phone, but for the last I dunnoe how long(3 1/2 weeks atleast) I have'nt had a working cell phone consitently at all.  So yeah happy about that

..its a Treo by the way, still with Verizon...soon to be Verizon/Alltel I hear lol or something

Umm classes, work and all that still going on great, no complaints...school is getting a little tough as far as the work load but It's nothing I can't handle.

But yeah anyways SUPERBOWL SUPERBOWL SUPERBOWL

Commercials sucked, game didn't really get hype till about the 3rd Quarter for me but I'm glad i watched the whole thing....Larry Fitzgerald started to go off but it was to little to late...at least Kurt Warner didn't give up and I'm glad they fought till the end cause that was probably one of the best Superbowl comeback comebacks of all time...yeah comeback comeback...cause The Cardinals came back, then the steelers and again I think, then finally the Steelers pulled out.

I was gonna put a bunch of pictures up from the game but I figure ill just put pic.s of my personal MVP...which I think he got it anyways lol Santonio Holmes

Held it down when Hines Ward kinda disappeared and when the Cardinals where making there push he basically sucked all the wind out of the entire Defense.

Now, personally I think The Cardinals DB's could have atleast batted the joint down, specially number 20 but I can also see how you either think you have help over the top and you could also think dude was out of bounds, so either way...if this was during the Season it would have just meant another loss, but because it was SuperBowl Sunday It was the SEASON lol

but yeah Congrats to the Pittsburgh Steelers...who knows whats to come for next year..I still have a pro-bowl to watch lol and I won't make my football picks till later...

anyways yall be easy like always

will hit this up later

peaace.

on chill

so yeah my day is over, finally..

had mad classes  all day, well it felt like it.  Did two papers, an outline and some Spanish.

just chilln now,

Waitin for this superbowl..think the Steelers will when, but since the Cardinals beat the Panthers a few weeks back I'll go for them...not jumping on the bandwagon just saying lol I'll go for whoever beat my squad.

Either way Im not as excited as I usually am about the Super Bowl...most of the time I'll be thinking about it during the week but It hasnt really come across, sept for when I look at ESPN.  Think Im more happy that we gon drink a little somethin, eat some good food and be with Family...Even though I don't get off till about 2 hours before it starts, I'll still enjoy.

I 4got I meant to put this cause its been on my mind...

I heard if you buy shoes for somebody, the superstition is that they'll walk out of your life or something like that...Does that only apply to bf/gf? or can it extend to friends..family? well I just did that, bought some shoes for somebody....I guess you could say at one time we was together but we are friends now...We had a good time while we went out but it was pretty mutual when we broke up so we stayed cool...at times it feels like im still with her, cause of how cool we are and the chemistry...but i make sure to let myself know what it is very quickly...anyways i bought her some shoes for her b.day...I won't say what for fear she might read here but they hot don't worry...but yeah, I mean I personally don't believe in that "saying" just wanted to bring it up..I wonder do ppl really believe in some of those superstitions..I dunnoe lol but anyways

Guess Ima go get busy doing something else, hit this up later

peace.

wet

Man it been raining allllll day.

Just thought Id let yall know lol..back later

peace.

...

So yeah I'm just vibe'n today...doing some work, listening to some music..reflecting.

Wanted to come here and be random..

oh yeah, them pictures from when it snowed...lol I have some

They just pictures from my homie dorm room...had to get an up top view..(I don't know photography terminology lol)

But yeah it wasn't deep just yet but It was coming...this was around 10A.M. or something.

Feel bad for staff who came to work that mourning not knowing it would snow, then they had to walk the entire campus putting out that salt stuff..

But yeah it was fun while it lasted, we was out the whole day and the next day pretty much...Well there was an delay the second day but It didn't effect me or my class's.

Anyways Ima get back on this work, hit this up later.

peace.

...

What up,

Just stopping by checking in...I still haven't posted back to back to back days in a while...I'm falling off y'all lol

but yeah ain't nothing really been going on...I been so focused on the same ol ish(school&work)

I'm enjoying everything that's going on, even though everything seems 10 x's harder in 09'...Don't think I have ever started a new year this hard...really since right before the new year...I think mid-December is when it started and it don't feel like I've stopped.

I still haven't found anytime to check out NOTORIOUS...mad about that since I'm probably the only person who hasn't seen it by now...shit I don't even know what else is in the theaters right now lol...MALL COP?? lol I just saw the commercial, but I like Kevin James...random

anyways

I'll have a break soon enough...I already took a couple days off for this week just so I could focus on homework and sleep...but then I'm going hard again for most of February...

Can't wait for spring break though...Nothing planned, just always liked that break during school.

But yeah on another note, RIP Kay Yow...She was the coach at NC STATE for Women's B. Ball...she passed away earlier this week after battling breast cancer....I never really followed State's Girls team other then the fact that I know who the coach was...but I mean she was a cool character to follow...She made it very known what she was going through and fought every step it seems like...again RIP..

ummmm lets see what else...

lol yooo random I was watch Kat Williams last night, funny as hell stillll....I heard dat nicca had went crazy or something though, or something was wrong wit him I dunnoe...but I know he funny as hell..I can't get tired of his comedy..

But yeah class Monday through Friday basically...sept for Tuesday...thursday...lol bout to hit some of this Bio...be back later

peace.

OBAMA OBAMA

Yeah yeah I know everybody and literally they mama lol have been posting stuff all day, and yelling about stuff all day...but I'm still going to also lol

I'm just as happy as I want to be right now.

Really feels like a major step has been taken forward...Man I'm just so glad that this day came, and can't wait to see what will happen next.

CONGRATS OBAMA AND FAMILY

I plan on doing a future post on what I expect to happen soon and other stuff...lol

but yeah guess what happened today?

IT SNOWED. lol people was loosing they minds last night, then it looked like it wasn't going to happen..then all of a sudden er body wake's up and its about 5 inches or so on the ground...Yeah yeah I know that's not a lot to some off y'all who might get 10 feet..lol well not 10 feet but you know what I'm trying to say...but I mean down here since we get a mix of everything, people like to get super cautious.

Ima post some pic.s of it later..

now I have to do homework since I know atleast one of my profesors are gonna have class tmrw, and the University is opening at 10am...so basically I gotta atleast attempt to go

be back later people..

peace

overdrive

What up people!

Mannn im so glad to finally have a break from homework, work work...yeah work work...and any and everything else that has been keeping me to busy, or lazy, or tired from coming here...work has been going on and on and on as usuall...Classes are going hard like always...and I havent been sleeping at all lol nah joking every chance i get I been tryin to lay it down...I been sick the last I dont know how many days but It hasnt stopped me to much, I think like a day or two it was bad as hell but Im str8 now...anyways let me catch up on some ish Im mad at..since its on my mind lol

Carolina[Panthers]-What the fuck man llol we was supposed to do it up, chicken wings..pizza, drinks;)..all that lol I was supposedddd to be watching you guys kick whoever's ass later this month..lol what the hell man....oh well better luck next year right?maybe you guys will finally run ANDDD pass and not be guessing what works anymore....Steve Smith cough cough is the best Wide Out atleast in my book he is...cause he's like 5'9 or something&he's a beast!!!...

Carolina[Tarheels]-What The fucking fuck lol now the panthers already fucked up...but alteast it was the end of the year and the shut a lot of folks up early...although they was fucking up still lol they was still where they was supposed to be by the end of the year....what the hell are yall doing???? i think we've dropped 2 str8 and on top of that...in the freakin ACC lol...whats good Tyler????lets get it going Psyco T!! lol shit man we possed to take it too, its your last year man I'ma be sad to see you go seing as how we both came into college same year lol so now who do I look at? lol I already know Ty Lawson is leaving, Danny Green too damn he a senior as well...shit Wayne might stay but who knows...and as for the rest of the guys, I have no clue what they gon do but Im worried the team gonna be so young next year that its gonna be one of those re-building seasons...Anyway though I got faith in my boys, They just figuring ish out still thats all...hope we dont drop no more though cause going 0-2 this early in the ACC isnt always good...any lower and we might be in trouble

notice how much I said "we" like I play for these teams or something lol Im just a die hard "Carolina Fan" whether it be Panthers or the Tarheels...and NO its not just cause im from here lol I really love those two teams...even since Carolina had Kerry Collins lol remember???? and Tim Biakabutuka...lol is that how u spell his name?lol still though thats wayyyyyyyy back lol die hard!

So yeah thats really it sports wise...lol

Hmmmm what else,

I guess I've been sticking true to my "new years resolution"...but you know what I hate using that fraise or whatever as a point of refrence to something I want to work on or do this year...becasue i feel like its shit from 08' I never even touched lol so why am I starting so fresh now? I mean I've got new ideas, and new things I want to try...as well as things from the past that still need to be worked on...Some people like to create this vision in their minds that say well hey last year sucked so this year will be better...true, I guess if you work at it...but aren't you really just continuing what you was trying to fix last time?I mean how new is it for most of us to say hey, Im gon loose some wheight lol or hey, i need to save money...shit you better be lol the way this economy is looking...People also like to say Im getting rid of all the bullshit in  my life, including the people...(bullshit people) lol...and like I hear it and ssee it on peoples blogs, status's on facebook, myspace...but I mean by the time July and August hit,ppl is steady complaining on they same websites or whatever...damn people get on my nerves, damn bullshit is old now, time for a change lol...dont get me wrong, i fall into bad habbits like that...im just saying im not one to say, hey im working on something new, when I know damn well Its just a backspin from last year...I got to much going on to be thinking up new shit, when I know last year still didnt work 100%...I just think its good to continue your work on what you wanted to do previsouly meanwhile adding new ideas to it, in a way spicing it up...so that you dont get bored of it...but dont stray away....Change is good, spareingly(spell that right?)...but to much change can become normal, and when something is normal..is it considered a change anymore? it gets old...worn out...and then lol something new HAS to come...which constantly spins this circle...maybe Im babbling and not making sense lol but atleast this blog long shit I havnt typed this much in a minute....anyways

I guess though its cool if you want to start over...cause now that I read this over and over, Im thinking well damn what if you been tryin gto work on something since forever....lol maybe you do need to start fresh..just dont start over every 2 months thinking oh well i give up...i hate that...i mean 4-6 months maybe  a year..okay...but like new years was 2 weeks ago...if you already trying to start something new now lol then damn what the hell yah know?

Shit i dunnoe im just typing..lol

ladys...guys...dudes...dudets...lol i just seen that on some tv show,

umm yeah though ALL YALL lol just do you this year...I think thats the best way to go about working out change is by to do you, THINK MORE as well as REFLECT MORE...however you do it...praying, talking, blogging lol...do whatever it is you do...

I know I will be lol, 

Anywayssss I think thats enough lol I'll see this blank white space soon...untill then

peace.

from my bed

I get to complain about feeling sick...lol

nah trying to keep a smile rather then a frown, but its toughhhhhhhh

Been working stupid stupid stupid stupid hard, but its all good...Drinking this juice, blowing air through this tissue[gross?sorry]

Head feels like the stuntman for Nick Cannon in drumline(beatn)

lol corny...see what the sickness does???

Anyways I just felt like I had to put something here in this empty top column of my blog. I miss it...maybe my head will clear later and something can be read here other then me telling u I'm sick.

stay tuned:

work progress report

class's started...

"i need a girl"part 1

and more..lol 

be back,

peace.

On my ish

So yeah a few days into this "new" year, I been grindin', seriously.

...lol that sounded funny when I read it back

Anyways,

I been doing real good at my new job, stackin up maddd hours and getting things in order.

I was supposed to start class today but won't "Officially" go until next Monday.lol...I just need more break time....sike nah I emailed my teachers and let them know what was going on with me.  Today(Wednesday) being the first day of class, and for most "out of towners" the first day moving back, or in...it wasn't really to big a deal to miss.  But I'll def. have to be there Monday, and will be. 

that make sense?lol

But yeah, I plan on renewing my blogger card and being the usual user I usually am lol.

I love coming here and typing whatever i want, after I sit and type all day for somebody else(my job)...

And damn I been working my other job too, did I mention that?..probaly not

But that job has always been pie for me, don't even really see it like work.

But yeah folks, I been goin hard,and dont plan on stopping anytime soon...ima hit this up later though, 

peace.